Thursday, September 9, 2010

Sharna's Story

The strap was holding on to me tightly. It felt like something was pushing me back. Like something didn’t want me to fall. My dad and I were bursting with laughter waiting for the ride to start.

The ride blasted like a rocket getting ready to depart to space. It twisted and twirled like a gymnast flipping and hand springing. I looked over to my dad all I could see was the G-force pulling his skin back and his hair coming towards his face. My eyes felt like they were going to collapse to the ground. And I thought the ride was going to crash-land. Me and my dad were so high we were like crazy eagles stalking its prey. Suddenly the ride was spinning so fast like it was out of control all I could see was colours floating everywhere. Then suddenly my hair decided to float in mid air because of how I was hanging upside down.

As time was going on the ride came to a slow stop. I felt so disappointed that I couldn’t say a word but just look annoyed and crossed because the ride had instantly stopped. Then I slowly hopped off the ride staring at it for ages. Then I thought to myself im going to miss you … not.

3 comments:

  1. Hi its me Sharna

    I think that i have done a great job on this.But i think the things that i need to work on is putting more feelings into my storys.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Hi its me Hayleeh

    wow sharna i think that you did a great work but you just need to have more smiles

    from Hayleeh

    ReplyDelete
  3. hey sharna its joey.

    I think your storys great but the similes are too close together.

    ReplyDelete